Snide Comments
by TitanFodder
Summary: Eren made the mistake of making a snide comment about Jean having his thumb up his ass. Eren X Jean, Smut, Rating subject to change.


It was, in Eren's opinion, that Jean was nothing more than an unemployable lazy freeloader that wanted people to give him the life he didn't deserve. In retrospect, everyone thought this, but Eren was the only one willing to point anything out. People weren't entirely afraid of titans, but one thing was for sure: They were definitely scared of being pointed out amongst their peers.

Eren sat back, munching on a piece of bread he had to fight with Sasha to get. He really couldn't stand the fact that she ate so much more than everyone else and never gained any weight. It was supposed that it was natural, since food was scarce. In one ear he heard Mikasa's gentle yet terrifying voice, and in the other he heard Jean, bragging to Marco about how skilled he was at everything.

It downright pissed Eren off.

"Jean will you just shut up already?" Eren didn't bother to get out of his seat.

Jean glared at him. "Yeah right, dumbshit." He turned back to Marco as if nothing happened.

Now Eren stood up and stomped all the way to the other. "You mind telling me what that was you just called me?" His hands formed into white-knuckled fists.

"Yeah I called you a dumbshit. If you didn't hear me the first time then maybe it was none of your business." Jean stood up, towering over him. He clearly wasn't afraid to speak his mind. As Eren tried to puff out his chest and look intimidating, Jean grabbed the collar of his shirt.

"Don't tear my shirt horse-face." Eren gave him the stare of death.

"Fine I won't." He raised his fist to punch the other. "I'll tear your face up a little though."

Then Eren remembered the technique Annie showed him during their training session, and used that very move to knock Jean flat on his ass.

And Jean was extremely surprised by it.

"What the hell was that kid?" He rubbed his head after having hit it on the floor.

"Just something I picked up this afternoon while you had your thumb up your ass." Eren dusted himself off.

Jean almost growled at him. That was an insult he wasn't going to take lying down. He got up and grabbed Eren's wrist. "Come with me for a sec." And before Eren could even respond, he dragged him off to the nearest men's bathroom.

Armin was going to follow, but Mikasa grabbed his arm and reminded him that it was Eren's fight, not his.

Eren struggled to get out of the other's grip: The ODM gear training really toned the older male's arm muscles. Jean had finally let go of him, but only when they were alone in the bathroom and Jean blocking the door.

"What the hell Jean." Eren clenched his teeth.

"You said I had my thumb up my ass. You really don't know how good it is to, and I quote, "Have my thumb up my ass."" He leaned against the door. "Both literally and figuratively it's good. You just don't know."

Eren's eyes widened slightly. He could already see where this was going.

Jean stalked toward him and Eren tried to make a beeline for the door, only to be stopped and bent over by the other. He flailed and struggled more to get out of his clutch, his hands grasping for his pants when he felt the other pull them down. Jean was too good though. He used Eren's movements to pin his arms behind his back and now he was sitting, Eren helplessly bent over his lap in the position you'd put a naughty kid to be spanked.

"Jean stop this isn't funny anymore!" He growled, almost to the point of crying from embarrassment.

"Hold still so this doesn't hurt so much." He got Eren's bottom clothes completely off, though it proved difficult because of the younger kicking his legs. Then he casually shoved his thumb in the other's entrance.

Eren teared up at first: it really did hurt more than he thought it would, but after a little while of Jean massaging it in there he started to relax a bit, and maybe even enjoyed it. But after Jean was done, he pulled his thumb out and dropped the other, who was tangled up horribly in his own clothes, on the floor.

"See? Not so bad." Jean moved to leave.

Eren whined. "Jean wait!"

Jean looked at the younger male, who was red with embarrassment.

"I-uh… well… please?" He hated how he sounded so confused, but he honestly was. He wanted more of it, since it felt so good the first time.

The silver-haired male stood above him. "You'll have to get on your hands and knees for me then."

Eren didn't want the other to tell him what to do but he really felt needy now. He did as the other instructed and tried to keep his shirt pulled down over his member. He didn't need the other to know just how much he enjoyed it.

Jean got down on his knees behind the other and slipped both thumbs in his ass, moving them around and stretching the other out a bit.

Eren let out a reluctant moan. "Jean~ More~"

The older looked at him contently. "If we do this, you have to keep it a secret." He undid his own pants and pulled his length out, stroking himself lightly, already hardened from touching the other.

The younger tried to nod.

Jean let go of the other's ass and reached around him, hands on his chest under his shirt, pulling him up against himself. With one long motion Eren's shirt came off and Jean attacked his lips with his own, his fingers pinching his nipples roughly. He swirled his tongue against the other's, which quickly became a tongue-wrestling contest between the two. Jean pinned Eren up against the floor and Eren pulled him right down on top of him, squishing the other's ass in his hands. He wrapped his legs around Jean's waist and worked the other's clothes off, letting the older male explore every inch of his body in the process.

The proof was in the pudding. Jean really was as good a lover as he claimed he was.

A small crowd had gathered right outside of the bathroom. Connie and Armin had their ears pressed against the door, while everyone else stood closely, quietly, wondering what was going on inside.

"Jean~! Harder~ Harder~" They heard from inside. "Right there baby right there!"

Connie blinked. "Okay, um… I think they're not fighting anymore…"

Armin just looked shocked.

Sasha was way too innocent. "Well that's good that they're friends now."

"Oh fuck Eren you're tight~" Jean cried loudly, loud enough that everyone could hear it.

"So wait are they fighting or are they not fighting?" Sasha frowned when everyone looked at each other.

"They're wrestling the way married couples do okay?" Connie got up and hiked away, dragging a forever-scarred Armin with him.

Everyone just stared at the men's bathroom door. They really didn't expect that.


End file.
